What "Ph. D." really stands for is . . .

• Patiently hoping for a Degree
• Piled higher and Deeper (after BS = Bullsh..., MS = More of the Same...)
• Professorship? hah! Dream on!
• Please hire. Desperate.
• Physiologically Deficient
• Pour him (or her) a Drink
• Philosophically Disturbed
• Probably headed for Divorce
• Pathetically hopeless Dweeb
• Probably heavily in Debt
• Parents have Doubts
• Professors had Doubts
• Pheromone Deprived
• Permanent head Damage
• Pretty homely Dork
• Potential heavy Drinker
• Professional hamburger Dispenser....."Would you like fries with that?"
• Pretty heavily Depressed
• Prozac handouts Desired
• Pretty heavy Diploma
• Pathetic homeless Dreamer
• Proudly half Dead
• Phinally done!